I was talking with a friend this morning. An old friend. I think we've known each other almost 10 years now. We met via something called an MMORPG. It stands for Massively Multiplayer Online Roleplaying Game. Or, you can just call it crack.
We were actually talking about depression. Clinical vs. Situational and how it's become quite epidemic in the world. This led into a discussion about the various coping mechanisms and one of them is - gaming.
I have, for years, suffered from low levels of clinical depression. I can be as happy as a clam about my situation. I can love everyone and everything around me. It's just that one load of laundry seems like Mt. Kilimanjaro and I don't want to do anything. I'm absolutely aware of it. Sometimes, I let it win and I sit around the house and do nothing productive. I "stew", as it were. It's really easy to get caught in that trap when you don't technically
need to leave the house.
Also, my depression is very clearly seasonal. The winter months turn me into a slug. The problem comes in my coping with it. I escape. I prefer to escape into games. I can tell you EXACTLY why, too.
Sense Of Accomplishment
When I start feeling like crap about sitting around and being sluggish, I can log in my little pixels and pull off some amazing stunt and feel good about myself. Even though, in the back of my little head, I know that I've done this in lieu of what I should be doing instead.
This year was a little different. This year, right as life was starting to bloom and call me out into the world, I broke my foot. Which led to much sitting on the butt and playing Rock Band 2 with the kids.
Now, here's where it gets sticky. Once you START yourself on that slippery slope, it can actually make the depression or sense of escapism worse. You start getting caught up in those accomplishments and they seem really important.
I'm lucky. I have live-in depression police. They say "Hey, get off the 'puter!" and I get up and start getting stuff done. I have a family to cook for and errands to run. It's important for me to get those accomplishments done daily. So, I do. Now that they are going back to school, it's time for me to get to the gym. If I don't, I'll sit here and get lost in my little virtual world.
I'm not at all saying games are bad. I'm also not saying everyone who plays them plays them for these reasons. I'm just saying that if you have that friend that plays a LOT of video games - consider taking them out once in a while. Don't write them off as hopeless. Perhaps it's just their way of dealing with whatever is going on.
The first year I was here in Germany, I hardly touched my computer. I was out and living and seeing and doing. If I force myself up and out, I get a lot better pretty quickly. This year found me a little less motivated. I felt the need for a vacation of sorts.
Vacation time is over. It's time to get back to the business of Getting Stuff Done (tm). To ensure that happens, I've signed myself up for a bunch of stuff that is sure to keep me busy and a little less...pixilated.
